Greetings, book and treat people! It feels like it’s been a million years since I did a regular newsletter—probably because it’s been over a month! I enjoyed making a few massive booklists (100 Trans Books I Love and All the Books I’ve Read So Far for Queer Your Year
May 1, 2023·edited May 1, 2023Liked by Laura Sackton
It is so so hard to be a single person trying to find family in a world that is not set up for single people. I am so fortunate to have and love the family I was born into, but I don't live near them, and there are so many things in the world that are just ~not~ for doing solo. I am trying to break out of that by attending events solo, but it's still so difficult sometimes to overcome that anxiety of being the odd one. And I would like to not do things solo forever, but everyone else is already in their group, and our siloed way of communicating now is so difficult to meet people and develop those true friendships we all crave. <3
Yes. I feel all of this so so much. It's hard, and I see you! One thing I struggle with (and want to do more of, and it's hard) is asking friends to do all the fun things that are mainstream coded as "couple activities". Whenever I do this, I am so happy. But having friends who have their "person" already, who becomes their default go to for activities, yeah, it's just hard.
Laura, the passage about how hard it can be to build and maintain your queer family/kinship ties really hit home with me, as a deeply introverted, single parent who (reluctantly) lives in the suburbs, and is still close with her siblings/parents. It was weirdly reassuring to know it’s not easy, period, to form and maintain adult friendships, because I definitely find it hard.
I'm glad it resonated. I feel like we don't talk about this enough! I am also deeply introverted, but I deeply value and need human connection, too. It is so hard, though. And I think it's so easy to feel like it's hard for us and not other people, you know? I think it's hard no matter who you are.
It is so so hard to be a single person trying to find family in a world that is not set up for single people. I am so fortunate to have and love the family I was born into, but I don't live near them, and there are so many things in the world that are just ~not~ for doing solo. I am trying to break out of that by attending events solo, but it's still so difficult sometimes to overcome that anxiety of being the odd one. And I would like to not do things solo forever, but everyone else is already in their group, and our siloed way of communicating now is so difficult to meet people and develop those true friendships we all crave. <3
Yes. I feel all of this so so much. It's hard, and I see you! One thing I struggle with (and want to do more of, and it's hard) is asking friends to do all the fun things that are mainstream coded as "couple activities". Whenever I do this, I am so happy. But having friends who have their "person" already, who becomes their default go to for activities, yeah, it's just hard.
Laura, the passage about how hard it can be to build and maintain your queer family/kinship ties really hit home with me, as a deeply introverted, single parent who (reluctantly) lives in the suburbs, and is still close with her siblings/parents. It was weirdly reassuring to know it’s not easy, period, to form and maintain adult friendships, because I definitely find it hard.
I'm glad it resonated. I feel like we don't talk about this enough! I am also deeply introverted, but I deeply value and need human connection, too. It is so hard, though. And I think it's so easy to feel like it's hard for us and not other people, you know? I think it's hard no matter who you are.